600 Years if British Painting (Children's Tour)
The Denver Art Museum
NOTE: The narrator of this tour is a 12 year old Cockney kid with attitude.
Asterisks indicate pauses in narration - one beat per pause.
INTRODUCTION:
1. GG #101. William Larkin
Three Young Girls c. 1600
TIMOTHY STANDRING: Hello - I'm Timothy Standring, curator of the Berger Collection at the Denver Art Museum, and I would like to welcome you to this exhibition on British art. The picture that you are standing in front of is a portrait of three young girls... Notice the exquisite handling of the drapery and the exquisite treatment of the lace,..FADE UNDER AND CONTINUE UNDER NARRATOR....The yellow lace surrounding the neckline and the wonderful satins in this painting.
KID NARRATOR: (undervoice) Pssst. Hold on there...you don't give a hoot about draperies and lace, do ya? C'mon, l'll show you some of the really neat stuff in these pictures. (louder) Hey...Professor Standring...uh...sir - can I tell 'em about some of these paintings?
TIMOTHY: Well, sure, Chip - you can go ahead. Go ahead and be the tour guide. I'd be interested to hear what you have to say, but remember that this is serious art that we are looking at.
KID NARRATOR: Sure, Mr. Standring... (undervoice) Yeah, sure... Okay. I'm Chip Fenwick - me mum's a dustwoman here at the museum. I know all about these pictures - but I know the good stuff. Like these girls are sisters -- see how they're all dressed the same? * And what do those fancy dresses and necklaces tell you? * * Yep, they're rich kids, alright. Besides, regular kids didn't get their pictures painted 'cause it cost a lot to hire an artist.
Sometimes they put clues in paintings that tell a story. See that ring the middle girl is wearing? * * Looks like a wedding ring. don't it? Think she's married? * 'Course not, she's just a kid. It's too big for her and she's got it tied on with a piece of string * * Some people think that it's her mother's ring and that it might be a clue their mum isn't around anymore.
And see the doll the littlest girl is holding? * Sure doesn't look like a Barbie doll, does it? * * It's a grown-up woman wearing old-fashioned clothes. That might be another clue their mum's gone. It's almost like the little girl is holding on to her memory. * * It's pretty neat what's hidden in a painting. C'mon, let's go look at some of the other pictures. There's a lot of cool stuff to see.
GG #102. Sir John Ferneley
The Hunt in Full Cry
NARRATOR: This here's a fox hunt - you've heard of fox hunting, haven't you? * Here's how it worked: They'd all ride out with a pack of hound dogs - see 'em there way over on the right near the stream? * * * When the dogs spotted a fox, the leader of the hunt would shout:
SFX: Tally Ho!
NARRATOR: ...and blow on his hunting horn, and off they'd go. They'd race across the fields like madmen, jumping over fences and bushes and anything else that was in the way. * See that cow in the middle of the open field? * * Looks like they're really giving it a scare. * Anyway, once they caught the fox, they'd go back to the house where the servants had fixed piles of food. Then they'd all pig out and brag about what a great hunt it was.
The guy who painted this picture, Sir John Ferneley, was famous for his paintings of fox hunts - in fact, it was just about all he ever painted. Look back by the first line of bushes, in the back. * * * See the guy in a white jacket coming through the fence? * That's Sir John, the artist - he painted himself in the picture. He also included a funny story. The artist really liked a woman named Lady Victoria Drummond. And the one in the blue jacket that he's riding with? * Right - none other than Lady Victoria.
Okay, now here comes the good part... look up front at the guy right in the middle of the painting - the one who's taking a nose-dive into the water. * * * Who do you s'pose that might be? * * Why that's Lady Drummond's husband!
SFX: splash of water, sputtering indignant man
Bit 'o wishful thinking on Sir John's part, eh?
GG #103. John Wooton
The Arrival of the King at Warren Hill, Newmarket Heath 1715-1720
NARRATOR: In this picture, they're getting ready for a horse race. See how they've got the horses all lined up to show them off? * * Back then, horse racing was a really big deal. One of the reasons was that the king liked it, and everybody wanted to do whatever the king did.
Can you find the black carriage on the hill? * * * The King of England just arrived in that carriage. And see that tall black thing back by the carriage? * * That's the king's special seat they brought out for him. It's got a roof on it to keep the sun off. It's all closed in like that so nobody could sneak up behind him.
The artist painted himself in this picture. Look up in front for a guy on a black horse with a dog running beside him. * * See the two guys standing in front of him? * * The artist is the one on the left with the pad of paper in his hand. Look real close - but not too close - and see if you can figure out what he's drawing. * * * I think if I'd been there, I'd want to draw a picture of the king in his special chair. Then I could show it to people and tell them how me and the king of England was best friends and they'd think I was really cool.
GG #104. Hieronomo Custodis
Sir John Ashbornham
1589-1593
NARRATOR: Woo! Look at this fancy fellow. * * Looks pretty proud of himself, don't he. That's some outfit, ain't it? Can you imagine havin' to wear sumpin' like that? * * Take a look at the bottom of his jacket, by his belt. * * See how it sticks out? * * That's because it was all the style to stuff padding inside to make it look like you had a pooky belly. * This fellow thought that if he looked all puffed up, it was a sign he was really smart and special. I don't get it either, but, y'know, that's why we still call people who act snooty - "stuffed-shirts".
See the slits in his jacket? That was so the bright, fancy lining would show through. And look at all those little buttons - how long do you think it took him to button them? * * Heh - didn't take him any time at all, cause rich folks back then had servants that dressed 'em. That's right, they'd get up in the morning and just stand there while some poor bloke had to put their tights on for 'em.
If you want to see what it feels like to wear clothes like this, the museum's got a special room set up with all kinds of stuff you can try on. Check it out. Just keep walking til you come to the room with orange flowered curtains.
GG #105. Robert Peake
Elizabeth Poulett 1616
NARRATOR: Wow! Look at that outfit, will you - and all that fancy lace. * * Y'know, they didn't have sewing machines back then, so all that stitching and sequins and tiny buttons had to be sewed by hand. Rich people would have whole teams of ladies sewing for weeks to make something like this. * And look at how skinny her waist is. * * That's 'cause they wore corsets - stiff underwear things that laced up and skooshed their tummys in so tight they could hardly breath.
Look real close at this lady's forehead. * * Do you see that blue vein? * * * Well, get this: it's painted on. Not painted on the picture - I mean it was painted on her. See, back then they thought that people who had thin, pale skin with veins showing were the very highest class of people. So when ladies put on makeup, they'd paint veins on so people would think they were special. Weird, eh?
And here's something else about the makeup they wore back then. It was laid on really thick. Sometimes so thick they couldn't move their faces very much. That's because people went for weeks without washing their faces - they'd just paint more makeup on. They hardly ever took baths either. Eeeww - can you imagine being in a room full of people who hadn't taken a bath for almost a year? Eeeeeewwwww...
GG #106. St. Nicholas & St. Barnabas
c.1390
NARRATOR: These pictures are pages from a book. They were made before they invented printing, back when all the books had to be written and drawn by hand, one by one. It wasn't all done by one person, but a whole bunch of them, each doing a different part.
See the shiny gold decorations? * * * That's real gold. They'd paint glue on where they wanted the gold parts to be. Then they'd stick sheets of really, really, really thin gold on it. Besides it lookin' really cool, all that gold was a way for the fellow who had this book made to show off how rich he was.
One of these guys is St Nicholas - he's the one on the left, wearing the pointed hat. St. Nicholas, sound familiar? * * * that's right, 'cause he's Santa Claus! They didn't call him Santa Claus then, but it's him, all the same. * * * Oooh - what's that next to him - is that a cooking pot with a little kid in it? * * * No joke, mate, that's what it is. St. Nicholas was the special saint of children because he was supposed to have saved them from bad things that happened. If he's gonna do any saving, I think he'd better get busy and pull that kid out of the pot before he's dinner.
GG #107. Joseph Nollekens
May Day 730-1740
NARRATOR: This 'ere's a painting of a country festival more than two hundred years ago. May Day used to be a big deal in England, especially with the farmers and villagers. Everybody for miles around would show up and there'd be lots of food and lots to drink. But before I tell you anymore about it, I gotta show you how to figure out who's who in the picture.
What the artist did was he painted the townspeople in dull, drab colors, but the rich folks in fancy clothes got painted with bright colors. * * See, they're mostly up front, just standing around, not doing much. * * That's 'cause they were too stuffy to have fun and mix with the townspeople. But a few of the rich people are tryin' to join in the fun. See 'em dancing in a circle right in the middle? * * *
Here, lemme show you some of the other stuff that's goin' on. Look up front, a little bit to the right. One of the townspeople is offering a drink to a fancy, rich lady with a pink ribbon on her hat. But she's turnin' away - probably 'cause he was drunk and he smelled really bad. * * Look back by the church. * * There's couple of fellows havin' a sword-fight with sticks. * * And if you look way over to the left, you'll see a couple of guys havin a wrestlin' match while everybody eggs 'em on and bets on who'll win. * * *
Can you find the couple who are smoochin' in the shadows? * * Look real close and see if you can figure out what everybody else is doing. * * Who do you think was having more fun, the townspeople or the rich folks? I know who I'd rather have been - how about you?
GG #108. John Charlton
More Free Than Welcome
1874
NARRATOR: Wow! Look at the size of this one! * * One of the things I really like about this picture is that, because it's so big, you can almost see every hair on the dogs. * * Ol' John Charlton sure knew how to paint 'em so they looked real, didn't he? See--fancy, purebred gentlemen used to think so much of their fancy, purebred dogs that they'd pay a famous artist to paint a picture of them. They wanted to show off how fine their dogs were, so they wanted 'em to look really real. But hey - what's that cat doin' in there? * *
SFX: ominous cat snarl and growl
Looks like it snuck in when no one was looking. That's why this painting is called More Free Than Welcome. Cats are free. They just come and go whenever they feel like it. They don't have to obey like dogs. I don't think this cat likes dogs very much - look at the way it's ears are laid back. * *
SFX: cat hissing
Those dogs look like they wish it would go away, don't they? * *A cat's free alright, even to go places nobody wants him. * There y'go. "More free than welcome."
GG #109. Samuel Henry Alken
Drags of the Four-In-Hand Club
1830's
NARRATOR: This 'ere's a picture of a drag race. * * * No, really - carriages like that were called Drags, and these 'uns are racin'. That makes it a drag race, right? That's where the word comes from.
Racing in carriages like this must have really been fun. Look at the horses galloping and the dust flying and all. * * [SFX NOISE GETS LOUDER--NARRATOR HAS TO SHOUT A LITTLE] I bet it was pretty noisy, too. Those big carriages would be rattling and the wheels would be rumbling, and people would be hollering back and forth.
[SFX: CALMS DOWN A LITTLE] Look at the guys riding on top of this carriage. * * They're goofing around and not holding on at all. See how that one guy is lighting a cigar like nothing was happening? * * * I bet it wasn't like that in real life, though. In a real race, those guys couldn't fool around like that - they'd have to hang on or they'd get bounced right off. * [SFX: GUY GETTING THROWN OFF--WHOA!] 'Course, maybe they did fool around and maybe they fell off all the time, I dunno. They did some pretty scary, exciting things in those days.
GG #110. Model Boat
c. 1810
NARRATOR: Pretty nifty model ship, eh? * The more you look at it the more you can see.... * * ...like the little carved man up front - that's called a figurehead, y'know. * * Wow, you can even see his tiny little sword! * * And see all those gun ports on the sides? * * Inside each one is a tiny carved cannon. * *
Y'know, what makes this one even niftier is that it was made by a French prisoner of war almost 200 years ago. I mean, you'd have to be a pretty good model maker to build a ship like that, even with all kinds of modern tools. The guy who made this one probably didn't have hardly any tools at all. He was a prisoner, so of course they're not gonna let him have a bunch of knives and saws and stuff. Maybe they let him keep his sailor's pocket knife - or maybe they didn't and all he had was an old piece of tin that he'd sharpened on a rock. And the only things he had to make it out of was scraps of wood and some old soup bones. It probably took him months and months to make this model boat.
GG #111 Peter Van Angellis
Les Charlatans
c. 1725
NARRATOR: The name of this painting is "The Charlatans." A charlatan is a faker. Look at the guys up on the stage. * They're actors and the play they're doing is a comedy about phony doctors. See that goofy looking guy at the front of the stage, holding the paper? He's telling the audience what a great doctor he is, and he's showing them his diploma to prove it. Behind him, another actor is pretending he's pulling a guy's tooth. Yow! I'll bet he's really howling!
Back then, plays were really popular 'cause they didn't have movies or TV. Troupes of actors like these would go 'round to the villages and put on shows. People liked plays like this one 'cause they made fun of stuff that people were scared of, and going to doctors or dentists was pretty scary in those days.
Look at all the people standing around in this picture - they aren't paying much attention to the play, are they? * * Maybe the actors aren't very good or maybe it's a really dumb play. When I look at paintings I like to make up stories about what's going on in them. This is a good one 'cause there's lots of people in it. Look real close. Can you see any good stories about to happen?
PORTRAITURE ll
GG# 112. Joseph Wright of Derby
Miss Francis Warren 1763
NARRATOR: Look at this cute little shepherdess with her lamb. * * * If you haven't guessed already, I oughta tell you that she's not really a shepherdess. For one thing, a real shepherdess would be wearing raggedy old clothes, not a fancy satin gown like this. * Nah, this little girl was the daughter of a wealthy family. I wonder what she'd say if she could tell us about this picture...?
CHARACTER VOICE (cultured little English girl): Father paid an arteest a lot of money to paint a picture of me. He said I could be anything I wanted in my portrait. I thought it would be jolly fun to dress up and pretend I was a shepherdess, holding a baby lamb. Well, it wasn't very much fun. The arteest wouldn't let me hold a real lamb 'cause he said it wouldn't sit still. So I had to hold a pillow and pretend it was a lamb. He painted the lamb in later, you know. And I had to sit still for the longest time. I couldn't wiggle a bit. And he didn't do it just once. He came back three more times and I had to do the whole wretched business all over again. But now that it's all finished, I think it's a perfectly lovely picture of me, don't you?
NARRATOR: Yeah, but I sure wouldn't want to have my picture painted with a dumb old lamb. I dunno how I'd want to be painted - umm - maybe with a tiger, a real one. * How about you?
GG #113. Thomas Whitcombe
A British Man Of War Before the Rock of Gibraltar
c. 1800
NARRATOR: There, now that's my kind of picture. Look at that ship - it's a British man-o-war. See those two rows of what looks like windows on the side? * * * Those ain't windows - they're gun ports and there's a cannon behind each one. See there - you can see them sticking out. Can you count how many cannon this ship carried? Remember, there's just as many on the other side of the ship. * * * *
You can tell how big this ship was by the size of the people along the railing. * * * Boy, it must have been exciting to be on a ship like that. Hey - see those two guys up on the platform on the rear mast? * * * That's where I'd like to be. Nah - even better, I'd like to climb up the ropes, all the way to the top of the tallest mast.
'Course, in real life, being on a warship was a lot of hard, dirty work. It was probably fun shooting the cannons, but you gotta remember that if you were shooting the cannons, some other ship was shooting their cannons right back at you. I mean, a kid could get hurt doing that.
GG #114. Edward Lear
Nuneham
1860
INTRO SONG:
The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
'O lovely Pussy! O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!'
NARRATOR: I bet you're wondering what that song has to do with this picture? * * It's 'cause the song was written by the artist who painted it - a guy named Edward Lear. He really liked kids and wrote a lot of silly songs and poems for them. A lot of them were "limericks" and they went like this:
CHARACTER VOICE - Edward Lear (Old man, Brit accent):
There was an Old Man on a hill,
Who seldom, if ever, stood still;
He ran up and down, in his Grandmother's gown,
Which adorned that Old Man on a hill.
NARRATOR: Just goes to show you that those old painters weren't such a stuffy lot. I like this painting because you can almost feel what it would be like if you were there. It's a nice, warm summer day, there's birds flying overhead, and it's all fresh and green. Look - you can see every little blade of grass and everything.
Mr. Lear didn't go to school to be an artist, y'know - he learned on his own. When he was only fifteen he got his first job as an artist, painting pictures of parrots for a book. So you see, even a kid can be a great artist.
Hey - y'know what I'd do if I was there in that picture? I'd run across that field as fast as I could and wave my arms and yell and make all those lazy sheep jump up and run...
GG #115 William Marlow
Vesuvius Erupting
1768
NARRATOR: Ooo...look at this one! (impishly) I bet the people in those houses are really scared with that red hot lava coming their way! * * The rest of this painting is kinda dark, you have to let your eyes get used to it to see things. Look down by the water, on the left, by the cliffs. * * See those people standing there? * * Do you think they're excited about being so close, or are they getting ready to jump in the water if the lava gets too close? * Don't you wonder why people would build a town right beside a volcano? Me, I'd want to be way, way far away.
This is Mount Vesuvius--a famous volcano in Italy. It's been erupting off and on almost forever. Italy was a popular place for British artists to visit. They said it was because of all the great Roman art of ancient times, but I think it's because it was a lot warmer than gloomy old England and they had better food. Of course, when the artists went there, they'd all to go see the volcano. Wouldn't you?
Do you think it really looked like this when the artist saw it? * * Nah, probably not, 'cause most of the time it just sat there smoking. He probably went out in one of those boats, like that one in the left corner, with the little roof on top?-- and made some sketches, Then he went back to his studio in England and painted this picture - with a lot of help from his imagination.