Donald
Trump
Welcome
to donaldtrump2000.com
Appealing
"to blue-collars and computer nerds alike." Right.
Content
Check:
Wow!
Look at all those marvy adjectives! Many with hyphens! Those don't
come cheap, you know.
Almost
all joking aside, we are truly excited by the prospect of this man
running for president. With Trump at the helm we can envision the
day that the White House will no longer be the private bed-and-breakfast
of sleazoid high-dollar campaign contributors. Instead, upon acquisition
by Mr. Trump, it will be converted into the world-class, top-notch,
four-star casino-hotel that our forefathers meant it to be.
Before
you go thinking that the Donald is not qualified to run for president,
check out his adjective-laden bio. Here's just a sample of the many
character building life experiences he'll use to give the Democrats
and Republicans a run for their money:
Foreign
Relations Experience: Grand Marshal for the German-American Steuben
Day Parade
Race
Relations: Conspicuously socializes with black and Hispanic celebrities.
Military
Background: Grand Marshal of the Nation's Parade celebrating the
50th anniversary of the end of World War II - plus, a grueling and
life-changing stint as Co-Chairman of the New York Vietnam Veteran's
Memorial Fund.
Ability
to Capture the Chick Vote: Trump Management Group LLC, a modeling/talent
agency representing some of the most beautiful faces and exciting
talent in the world.
Finger
on the Pulse of Bean Counters, Laborers and Religious Types: Committee
to Complete Construction of the Cathedral of St. John the Divine.
Boy
Howdy! Bet none of the other candidates can claim that kind of experience.
Navigation
Nags:
Not
many. This is a business-like site. Links go where they're supposed
to, when they're supposed to, and there are no surprises when you
get there. Sometimes, that can be a negative.
We
were pleased to discover that the graphics on the front-page are actual
links - an unusually clever concept for a campaign site. Unfortunately,
there are no corresponding text links for the visually or browserly
impaired.
Don't
Miss:
"How
Can I Help Donald?" Here's your chance to donate $25, $50, $75,
$100, $250, $500, or $1,000 toward the exploratory committee for a
man whose "current net worth is estimated at 5 billion dollars." Me
first!
